hurts
it's 9:30pm monday night and i'm in bed with my laptop resting nicely on my cramping empty uterus. sounds delightful, doesn't it?!
nearly a week has gone by since the doctor told us our baby died and i'm still waiting for what feels like an endless dose of novocaine injected in my heart to wear off. i can handle the physical pain from the surgery and all that is involved after, but the emotional pain is another story. i don't do pity. i told myself over and over again to "snap out it"...."get over it"...."move on". i guess i'm a horrible listener because yesterday and today i had the biggest pityfest of my life. i cried like i have never cried before. i was one very snotty-nose, sobbing mess!
tomorrow i go back to work. i'm super thankful because if i had to spend one more day watching daytime tv i was going to call in a refill of vicodin requesting a much higher dose.
one day at a time, right?!
Aww, hang in there Mel. I can't even imagine what you're going through. :( But I am thinking about you and Adam every day since I found out and praying for the best... You two are great -- xoxo.
ReplyDeletethanks steph! we're doing much better with every passing day. :-)
ReplyDeletexoxoxoxoxo
Mel! We hadn't heard! I am soooo sorry, I didn't realize it had been so long since I dropped in on your blog either.
ReplyDeleteI had a miscarriage before I got pregnant with Jaxon. It is heartbreaking. And my Dr. wanted me to wait one full cycle before trying to get pg again. That was the longest 6 weeks of waiting. Then it was 3 months before I got pregnant again.
I had only known I was pg for a couple of weeks though. My due date had been 11/4 and I miscarried the second week of March. I imagine it was probably harder on you having been farther along.
Know that you are in our thoughts and prayers. I am so sorry you had to go through this.
All our love, Amy